Today, they win!

Autism is often a long confusing list of endless reasons to hate the day you ever heard the doctor dare utter the words to you regarding your loved one and until you find the much needed therapies to assist you and your loved one, the despair that comes with such a diagnosis is grounds for life changing amounts of stress! Okay, so we’ve talked about the rough start to how it often begins for families and the newness of ‘life on the spectrum’ ….but this is not what this post is about tonight!

Fast forward if you will, after 6 1/2 years of hard core, hand tailored and structured, long hour, type therapies ….to TODAY! Today we had a 4 hour play date with a buddy, (also on the spectrum), that went like this: They shared lunch, played video games, watched a movie, had a nerf gun war and rode bikes and scooters, together! Not one meltdown or tough moment to work through from either kiddo!!! Guys ~ this is like the super bowl of social interaction! My child, my only child… until I decided to start the fostering to adopt process, who thinks that “sharing” is the other kid watching my child play ……shared!!! EVERYTHING!!!! People, I can see where my millions of dollars in therapy is finally making a dent!!! No, really …all kidding aside it is days like these that I do also acknowledge and want to thank the other family with whom we have shared this day with, (and they know who they are), for they too should revel in the fact that they have helped their child to overcome social hurdles that our children are often told they are incapable of doing……well they indeed did it today and did it BIG!!!!

Autism, today you did not win this round but instead our kids did and you were nowhere to be seen! Today, Autism our kids kicked your tail and sent you packing back to where you belong!! Today, we were just a normal family hanging out with our buddy and having a good day and enjoying the world as it was meant to be if you were a kid~ with friends!

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The stepping stones in his path!

Bakugans The life and love of a boy with autism and the world we share together! Menu and widgets You are following this blogYou are following this blog (manage).Oatmeal and Bakugans The stepping stones in his path! Did you ever as a kid try to jump from one stepping stone to another in some path along a garden somewhere back in time? Were the stones placed just right so that you could land perfectly from one to the next? Or, did you find it a struggle and look for ways to stay atop the stones without falling off and still make it to the next without skipping a

via The stepping stones in his path!.

The stepping stones in his path!

Did you ever as a kid try to jump from one stepping stone to another in some path along a garden somewhere back in time? Were the stones placed just right so that you could land perfectly from one to the next? Or, did you find it a struggle and look for ways to stay atop the stones without falling off and still make it to the next without skipping a stone and thus your game having failed you? You probably found that you needed each stone to line up just right so that your stride would allow you to reach the next without failure, am I right?

I look back to the beginning of Connor’s journey with autism and even before his super power had a name, his first “stepping stone” of support was already in place! I really don’t know if it was that he picked his first stone himself or if she saw just how great his needs were, but Connor’s very first stone of support on his path to success was the daycare manager, Renae. I was headed back to work full time and Connor was over a year old when I expressed my concern to Renae about some of his noted delays showing up but she assured me she would take care of him! Wow! Did she ever, the two be came inseparable almost from the start! Renae’s office became “Renae and Connor’s office!” He became attached at her hip and he stole her heart (and her husband’s too!) He went everywhere she went and did everything she did, and I’m pretty sure, 8 years later I still owe her some back pay for the extra care and attention that he was so demanding of her back then! But then again, that’s just it…. stepping stones are just there by their very nature in nature for whatever comes their way, right? To take whatever “needs” to step on or over them that day! It’s their job, their only job and they do it well!

Renae never once came to us with all the needs our son had and never, not one time did she say that he was too much to handle! And I have no doubt during those days before Connor had words and before he had glasses, which meant he had little to no real eyesight and then the added sensory and processing issues to go along with that in a busy daycare setting, he had to be one upset and confused child, thus the reason she was there being that stone that he needed at all times…. Bless her, but you tell me how that stepping stone didn’t break?

There are times when I want to go back and do over things I have done wrong and the mistakes I’ve made regarding the needs of my child… I’m sure more of those feelings are to come, however, stepping stones in his “path” such as the likes of Renae and the others that have followed I will forever be indebted to….. Renae, Thank You for being his first!

Be sure to thank your stepping stones, for if you go back and recount the path your child has taken…. chances are that even though you know he/she has darted off the path a time or two, there were still plenty of “stones” they found along the way that lead them back to where they are now!

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You are my son’s challenge and I accept you: daily!

Does the heading above for my letter to Autism sound odd to you? It is my son’s birth right, if you will, but “I” accept it daily! What is this you say? Me, accept it daily, how dare….. Wait, let me explain please….

It is “his” diagnosis yes, not mine and it is a part of him and not all of him let me first say that so that we are clear! Now, let me say that again: It is “his” diagnosis and it is a part of him and not all of him and a part of him that is a challenge daily that I wake to each and every day. I greet it with my first cup of coffee and it joins me in my first prayers of the day before I can even begin them. It follows him to school in our car and into the classroom inside his backpack. His challenges stay with him through the morning hours of learning and even through the lunchroom and bathroom after that. They have not left him as he attempts to make friends on the play ground at recess late in the day either, for his challenges have hung on tightly up until I roll up in that pick up line to get him and he greets me with an all too familiar “sigh” of relief each afternoon.

Yes, Autism you cause many anxieties and uncertainties in the life of my son and I know you will continue to attempt this therefore YOU ARE MY CHALLENGE!!!! I TAKE YOU ON DAILY AND IT IS PERSONAL!!!!! I could choose to sit back and let you work your destruction through his life and turn a blind eye to what might come of him but Autism…..that is NOT going to happen, you’ve picked on the wrong family! I will question his diagnosis, I will question his therapies current and future, I will question his education ~ each and every year, and I will question other “obstacles” down the road. So far, just so far from questioning these things this child of mine that once had no words, is now a very verbal 2nd grader who made the honor roll this year! Not to mention he’s tried his hand at horseback riding and even got the chance to play on our city league basketball team, (a team sport hmmm, Hello Autism ~ You normally say those with Autism just cannot play in “team” sports, well take that shut up juice Autism!), where he not only learned to put one through a basket but also and this is the best part (so listen up, Autism), a bunch of 9 and 10 year olds accepted him, more or less, for who he is …just a kid, like them!

Autism, you no doubt will continue to challenge US and WE will take you on DAILY!!! I, for one am not worried, I have a lot of COFFEE and PRAYER awaiting you!!!! See you in the morning hours ~ as always!IMG_20140214_205157-001